Notes & Scraps

So, things in the hotel have been a bit crazy.  Mellissa has left due to family issues, I respect her too much to say more, but let's just say that she's one of the few people I actually would pray for.  With her gone, the owners have decided to put in their own people, and if anyone knows what country the name Patel comes from, you can catch my drift.  So, as of today, I've put in my two week notice.  It honestly has little to do with what's going on in the hotel, it's more of my job at the station.  Since I've taken this job, I've been constantly exausted, and even on my off days, I feel like I've just gotten off a long day.  It's been affecting my performance at the station to the point I don't like it.  I used to come in 2 hours early, now I'm lucky if I'm 10 min. So this afternoon I talk to Alan & Bryan (Program director & Asst P.D.) about if they needed a producer for the morning show.  They do, however the higher ups don't want to spend the money on a good producer when Luke can run it just fine.  I told them both my situation, and they apparently have a meeting in the morning and they're going to bring something up.  I really hope I can land the full time gig.  That'll put alot of stress off me, and I can devote all my time to them without having to worry about going over on hours, or needing to sleep cause I just worked 14 hours.  It's late, I'm stuck at the hotel, and chances are I'm going to have my answer before the few of you who read my journal, but I just needed to vent.

Well, back from Biloxi.  That place is evil...not like own your soul evil.  More like suck you in so you never want to leave evil.

I guess that's how casinos work.

Made it around 7 am Monday but my room wasn't ready, so we went down to check out the casino.  Had some fun playing blackjack, a few slots and such.  The $5 min bet on the table games were a killer, but I pulled through.  Later on after our room was ready (which was NICE for 68 bucks.) I got up the balls to play Roulette and wound up winning like 150 bucks.  Later after loosing on the craps table, I was starting to feel that gamblers depression.  So I took my last 40 bucks to go up to the poker room.  After about an hour and a half I was up $120.  So it looks like I know where I'll be spending most of my time next time I go over there :) 

Fucking wierd.

An old roommate just found me on myspace, the one that threatened to kill me.  


It's odd though, talking with folks from my bad past.

Water indeed runs under the bridge.

What a friggin night. I come in at 10 and Joni was on the phone looking up the number for the Greyhound, she can't find it, so my google skills save the day. After she leaves I get a call from apparently the same guest, wanting the number again, but hangs up before I can get it. Then he keeps calling asking for this, and that. Shortly after that, a woman comes in, talking about the guest being just released from West Florida Behavorial.

Wow. really odd, another dream I had last night was pretty much the same thing, except I was a cop trying to show up for duty.  Only I keep getting pull away from getting to my destination. hrm...A trend appears

So, for some reason I was with a group on  our way to prison.  They had all of us calculated by the amount of violence we're capible of.  I don't remember what number I was, but there was some emo looking guy with a .31% probability.  All I remember was us trying to get to our desitnation without any presense of guards what so ever.  One of the guys was a major dick (40something plus probability) and at one point I was trying to fight him to shut the fuck up, but most of the time in my dreams, fighting someone is like punching in water.  My hits are weak and usually miss. But what I lacked I made up in wits and got the bastard to STFU.  It was interupted by my phone going off.  -sigh- I never get to the good parts.

On Rush Limbaugh today he tried making fun of gays by playing Klaus Nomi

Here's a pic for folks who came after his time.



So Luke and I started discussing bizzare shit and he mentioned Joseph Pujol, AKA Le Petomane (The Fartiste)

So, my brief vacation was alright. I didn't get to stay on the beach like we planned, but I figured "fuck it...I gotta stop trying to plan every moment in my life" That dream is still fucking with me shit keeps happening that makes me think it was more than a dream. Things are going well. The vacation was a well needed rest, and now, I can go back to work without feeling stressed. Now my main goal is to get me out of my folk's place. It's going very well with them, but I just need to get out. Sorry to my few readers for my lack of explanation, as much as I babble on about nothing IRL, on the net, I'm a man of few words.

( This isn't depression )

I'm not really the black sheep of the family.  I've always grown up like a salmon in a lake.  Sure he can survive, but he doesn't really fit in unless it's mating season.  My entire family is way up in the great white north.  So, I never really got to know them.  Last night my dad's cousin came by to visit and I learned a few things. 

I'm {distantly} related to the author of Ann of Green Gables.
There's an island in the family, it'll be 100 years we've owned it in 2011.
Apparently our whole family is just as eccentric as I am.  
My roots go back to Cornwall England, one of my great grandfather was the head of a church in there, even had his name in the stone, however the church was ruined during WWII (fucking Germans)

Well, I'm moved....everything's going smooth currently, but I'm busting my ass.

It's 6am, I've been here since 9pm and I'm not done till 10.

Tonight I'll get to sleep, but who knows the next time I'll get a chance too after this.

But currently money is more important than sleep

Meh...everything's just stale...it's always stale.

Well, the Days Inn called.  Wanting me to come in and fill out the paperwork and go to their little meeting.  Meaning I got the job!

Things are coming together nicely with the move fast approaching.  I just gotta get my shit straightened out before I get too busy to do anything about it. 

Well, one week till moving day and things are looking pretty smooth.  Still need to get the storage unit, but that'll be no problem.  I found a person willing to take the rats, thanks to a yahoo group.  I'm relieved they won't be snake food.  Not saying snakes shouldn't eat, I just don't want them eating MY rats.

My back hurts...I need a chiropractor.

And that's where the train of thought gets de-railed

So my insurance is due.

I never was good at paying those fuckers.

They piss me off.

You spend a shit load of money in case something happens, but when it happens they go.  "well you had your accident on the third day of the full moon on a wednesday, so therefor it doesn't qualify."

Bastards.


But I must do it, so I will....at least it's less than it used to be.

So, I'm in that post interview limbo again.  I did well at the interview for the many hotels that are on Hwy 29.  Just hope they can juggle me around my shifts at the station.  At least they know I'm a hard worker since I'm here 7 days a week.  Mostly I don't mind it because it's the only time I have with internet access.  On top of that, this isn't the type of company that bans any website that's remotely risqué.  Not saying they're not keeping track of it, but I have enough freedom to check my mail, write these blogs, and play my web games.

Went and got another heroin scar.  It's always fun to get hooked up to a machine that syphons our your fluids.

It's been pretty good lately.  I'm getting more energy, but then again, Mom's been feeding me.

I always knew what I was doing to myself.  I even acknowledged it.  But there wasn't any choice.  I just had to brace myself, and take the hit.

Could be worse.  I could actually be on heroin.

Scar tissue is stronger than regular.  Recognize the strength and use it. ~ Rollins

they killed me, they've tied my hands with rope and now they drag me up
the street
a woman is struggling to kick me in my skull, if she could she would kill
me again...
I can see her teeth shine as she kicks at my dirt covered eyes, so blind
oh mother! they hate me so much, the hatred's real! and now it's mine...

they sit below me, stare up and scream out threats- at my nakedness
their tongues are hanging from out of their mouths, I hope they don't
tear me
...limb from limb
so much noise, so much hatred, so much violence... they love me!
they'd kill to have me... they'd have to kill me! their hatred's pure, I
am divine!

when ya kick me?
when ya rape me?
when ya burn me?
when ya break me?
I am divine! I am divine!
when ya kick me?
when ya rape me?
when ya burn me?
when ya break me?
I am divine! I am divine! divine! divine! divine!
divine!
I am divine! I am divine! divine! divine!
divine...

show me how ya really are... show me how you really feel...
let me know that ya really care, let me feel that your hatred is real!

you hate me- I can see that it's real
you do things to me that you never thought ya would!
you hurt me- you'll never know what I feel
what ya bring me, I never thought you could
give me more, make me stronger, high on your poison
I am divine!

when ya kick me?
when ya rape me?
when ya burn me?
when ya break me?
I am divine! I am divine!
when ya cut me?
when ya rape me?
when ya burn me?
when ya brake me?
I am divine! 

HOLY Aunt Jamima batman!


Who turned on the fucking lights?



Too much shit! OK, so not THAT much. It's alot of shit, but not too much.

I've always had a hard time dealing with change.

Frankly I've been a major douche....srsly....that or a turd sandwitch

prob both....

a bloody.....smelly....turd sandwitch......with mustard.

The major thing I'm not sure of,
is this normal? or is it just mania?

For everyone's sake...


...I hope not.

...No exceptions.

I see a lot of shit going on in the media

Every. Single. Day.

It's what I do, it's my job.

I feel that media as we've known it is completely changing. 

We all know the internet, but all this copy-write issues, is rather a mood point.

Hypothetical:

A kid downloads a song illegally.

Kid downloads his favorite anime illegally.

Kid gets tired of 2girls1cup and splices a song to cips from his favorate anime.

Kid uploads said splice cut to youtube.

Video gets millions of hits.

The song brings up memories, and a few dozen people realize they don't have it and rush to iTunes to buy it.

The Anime part was so funny, they had to see where it came from, and orders it from Amazon.

It's full of win.